Thoughts

Side A – Side B

It’s late in the night and I’m tired from a hard day’s work, bloodshot eyes, and a mind in doubt.

Now I apply Gandhi’s mantra and to some extent I see clearly what’s wrong, and thus I decide to write about it, not in my journal, but on my blog, hoping for some empathy, although at this moment I do not know what to write, I’m just making this sentence way too long!!

This might look funny but I’m going to tell you both sides of the coin, related to my doubts, or maybe they’re someone else’s doubts too, if they too think that life is about making decisions that you can live with, rather than those that leave you with guilt after a high. (Shit! Long sentence!!)

Side A: I’m pretty good at programming and people appreciate my work
Side B: I don’t want to do it anymore, I love Art!

Side A: I want to make money fast but honestly
Side B: I have an honest, fast-paced job with less money

Side A: I want to be cool
Side B: People say I’m intelligent

Side A: I think too much about other people’s opinion
Side B: Yet, I do things my way and then think more about others

Side A: This post looks cool to me
Side B: It’s totally about me :p

I ask my bloggy friends to read this, maybe you face doubts like these in your lives, if you do, I’d like to know.

But you know, the answer to all these is pretty straight forward. Just sleep over them and whatever you ever do at any time in life, just be honest and do your best.

(I had to write it out to find the answer :))

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4 thoughts on “Side A – Side B

  1. you hit the nail on the head Eeshan!!! mind it , we all face exactly these dilemmas in life, but no one had the courage to admit it, to come up with it so honestly. well done. kudos to your honesty. but sometimes, i would say, its worth all the guilt to have some enjoyment in life. So please, for once, go out and do that which your guilt stopped u form doing.

    1. Thanks for understanding Divya.
      Do you remember the time when we went for a GK Quiz in Air Force Bal Bharti School? While we were given some time to prepare, I showed you a piece of paper that I took out from my wallet. I had written out my favorite quotes from Vivekananda, might have even read them out.
      Would you be surprised if I told you that even though the wallet has changed, but that paper is still there? It’s battered, torn and looks really old.
      I didn’t just write it out to impress girls or teachers, I really believed in the power of those words, and still do. I try to live by those ideals as much as I can. I’m not a stupid or credulous person either, so I hope you understand what I’m trying to say here…I can’t express this in any other way.
      But I do say, I’m really sorry I let you guys down this time.

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